A Real Geek’s Primer on General Computing, Part 1
Every day I get hit with tech questions and read comments from people who are either computer-illiterate, computer-literate, “think-they-are-geeks”-computer-literate, and “really-are-geeks”-computer-literate. It will soon be 20 years since I first started computing. Computers, the internet, and technology in general define the largest part of my life. Sure, I love my wife, the Devils, my pets, etc. And while some of those trump a computer in importance to me, my wife has not had the same effect on my life that the computer has. This is no slight to her – simply put, I didn’t even know her until 6 years ago, and while she is much more important to me than computers are, we wouldn’t be together if we had not met thanks to computers in the first place.
Learning computers for me has become a life-long endeavor even though on the surface I don’t have many credentials. I do not program – I can manage to read and understand what a program is doing when looking at the code due to working on computers for so long, but I can’t actually program. I am not a hacker nor even a script kiddie – this is also because of my lack of understanding in programming. I am not an IT guy – even though I could easily hold my own doing the job if I just did a little bit of studying on running corporate networks, I have no real desire to do tech support.
So what do I know about computers and technology?
I built my own computer and have been using computers for nearly 20 years. I know what Prodigy is and used it. I have built my own websites, I am good enough to do webdesign in Photoshop for small-to-medium businesses, and I can design basic/intermediate Flash. My troubleshooting skills are top notch – not only do I know how to fix most problems, I know how to diagnose what the problem is faster than most people. My knowledge extends to all technical devices – DVD players, cell phones, etc. You all know “that family member” kid who is 15 and always has to fix your computer? I’m him with 10 years more experience.
Most of all though, I know how to wield technology properly so that it enhances my life rather than let it slow me down.
So I figured it would be fun to point out all the observations I have while dealing with technology or watching other people try to handle it and reduce it down to a few key points that most people get caught up on.
#1 – “Google It” and how I fix computers
People say “Google it” as a response to any general information you might want to find out. Can’t remember the name of that girl in that one movie with the guy who…? Google it.
Yet, people seemingly suck at remembering this rule when they have an issue with their computer. I can tell you after doing tech support for all my family, extended family, friends, friends of friends, coworkers, friends of coworkers, and all the people who reached me during my stints as technical support that the first thing I do when presented with a problem if I don’t know how to fix it is Google it (minus the time I did cell phone tech support, in which case you are provided with your own mini-Google of company information giving you schematics, walkthroughs, encyclopedias, etc. for how to fix anything).
While I am researching the problem, I am usually multi-tasking working on figuring out two other things. First, when did this problem start and did you do anything that caused it to happen? The reason “when did this problem start happening?” is the first question any technical support person who doesn’t completely suck at their job asks is because it is the most important. If your e-mail stopped working at 5:20PM yesterday and there happens to be a corrupted e-mail in the inbox that came in at 5:19PM, then we have a pretty good lead on what the issue might be.
Second, should I reboot the system/device? If I think this is just a bug in the system because something has worked 99 out of 100 times in the past, then I will quickly turn the device off and back on. This fixes most things and should be tried before you even bother to Google. If it is something that I don’t think is a glitch, and is a problem with a piece of software installed or the settings on your computer (like “my email won’t open this attachment”), then there is really no reason to restart the computer. If you want to try this next time, a more detailed question is “Do I think this is a one-time problem that never happened before, and did it also occur without me touching anything?” If you touched something, chances are you screwed it up and the reboot won’t fix it. If it just started having a problem “all of a sudden,” turn whatever it is off and back on first.
Back to Googling, sometimes I sit and have trouble figuring out how I should word what I am asking to get specific results for my issue. “Computer won’t work” in Google is not going to help you at all. “Computer won’t start” gets you a little closer as now we know you cannot get the computer from being turned off to fully booted and turned on. But really, you want to throw in more about what is happening. If your computer turns on, you can hear the fans running, lights start blinking, and you get a few screens before the computer gets to Windows and finishes booting, then that is a very specific problem. “Windows won’t start” would be a good place to begin Googling.
Google itself helps you from there. I tend to look at the results and start throwing keywords into my search. From here, it helps because I know about computers, but you should at least try to find one solution in Google, do it, and if your computer STILL doesn’t work, THEN call your personal geek up for help.
I’m not trying to suggest that everyone should know everything I do about computers, but I find most people get flustered by the smallest things and just assume they have no idea where to start. A good example is “the internet stopped working.” There is a myriad of reasons that can happen, and many do require people who know about computers to fix the issue, but did you unplug your modem’s power and then plug it back in after a few seconds in the first place? Surprisingly, this solves probably 50% of the “it just stopped working all of a sudden” issues. So, take a deep breath and just think about the basic things you can do yourself.
Truth be told, most geeks don’t know how to fix your problems. They know the tools that tell them how to fix your problems. Google is the biggest one, and it is astounding how many people have the world’s information at their fingertips and can’t even be bothered to type in a general search about the problem they are having before calling up someone they know and putting their problems on them. As nice as geeks can be, I can assure you that I would rather be drinking alcohol and playing video games rather than doing tech support unless I am getting a blowjob for it afterward.
Just sayin’.